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Hadley Company Services
Scenario 3- Hadley Services
Deliverables are more like reports but serve to provide more information and answers to
the problems facing clients. Besides, frequently asked questions by clients concerning problems
they encounter with a company’s products are also addressed. Below are deliverables of a case
scenario pertaining to the services offered by Hadley company.
To: Ms. Pat Williams
Hadley company is pleased to serve its clients and take pride in the partnership with
them. Every development that occurs with the use of the company’s products and services is
taken into account and acted upon. We appreciate your recent signing to use our services. Any
problems encountered can be reported anytime to our service team. Our new technician, Allen
Franks recently attended to your machine on a safety check session but met some slight technical
problem after that. We apologize for that. We were able to dispatch our other experienced
technician accordingly to ascertain the nature of the technical hitch. Marcus, our esteemed
technician, could point out that the problem was simple as the previous technician had forgotten
to connect the data port properly. Therefore, it caused failure in the machine to record data.
Marcus rectified it and contentedly reported that it worked well after solving the problem.
Hadley company is working to deliver the best in its services to the clients. We encourage our
esteemed clients to be free and report any concerns that develop with the use of its services and
To: Ronni Simms, Hadley Client Rep
Greetings Ms. Simms, it is a pleasure of Hadley company to have secured the signings
that have seen the partnership with St. Francis clinic which is one of our good partners so far.
There has been a smooth relaying of information concerning the use of our products and
services. Our department, in particular, is pleased with St. Francis Clinic. We recently responded
to an emergency call from the clinic informing us of the technical problem in one of their
machines after a purposed safety check. It was a small problem, but we treated with the utmost
responsibility. Our new technician had forgotten to fix the data port as required thus prompted
one of our experienced technicians, Mr. Marcus, to identify and fix it. Am confident that St.
Francis clinic will be able to use the machine without any problems and encourage them to
forward their concerns to our team anytime.
To: Allen Franks
Our entire team is impressed by the bold moves to deliver its services to the clients.
Regarding the recent safety check duty on St. Francis clinic, it was commendable how you did
the work despite being new and not having much experience. It was however noted that a
problem developed after the safety check. One of the data ports had not been fixed well hence
failure to record data.
Consequently, we sent one of the experienced members, Mr. Marcus to ascertain and fix
the problem. It was a simple mistake that I hope will not occur once you have gained enough
experience. In line with that, we encourage our new technicians to work in collaboration with our
experienced staff. It will ensure close monitoring and the eventual gaining of experience. We
hope to see you deliver quality services and help strengthen confidence in our clients consuming
our products and services.
FROM: Mr. Passmore
RE: Correspondence Documents – Draft
Giant Walls of Text
Unfortunately, I’m still occasionally seeing these throughout your responses. Consider this: if you
were to receive a memo or an e-mail from a colleague and it contained nothing but a giant block of
text, would you read it? Probably not, right? In the future, break up your writing into smaller
paragraphs – this makes your work so much easier to read.
You must always consider the relationship you have with your recipient. If the recipient is the CEO
of your company, for example, as seen in one of the scenarios, it would be unprofessional to address
her by her first name. It’s too informal. Instead, address her by her full name and title, e.g., CEO
[First and Last Name].
The same line of thinking applies to recipients outside of your organization. If, for example, you’re
writing to a disgruntled customer, as seen in a number of the scenarios, you would likewise not
address this person by their first name. You are not on a first-name basis with this person. In fact,
this person is actually angry with you and your company. As such, addressing them as “Mr.” or
“Ms.” is a sign of respect, a sign that you’re taking their concerns seriously.
Lastly, I would always avoid salutations like “To whom it may concern,” or other anonymous
salutations. They’re just too impersonal. Always address the recipient by name; or, if you are
addressing multiple recipients, address them by the name of their group, e.g., “Marketing
Development Team,” or “Dear Valued Customers,” etc.
Wrong Document Type for Purpose
Memos, formal letters, and e-mails are not the same thing, and serve different purposes in the
workplace. Memos, for example, are best used when delivering lots of information (usually updated
polices or procedures) to a large audience. Also, you do not sign memos.
E-mails and formal letters, on the other hand, do mostly similar things, but their key difference is
formality. E-mails are informal, whereas formal letters are, well, formal. E-mails are generally used for
daily, inter-office communication (and can be formal in tone, depending on the context), while
formal letters are best reserved for delivering important news to a single recipient (and are always
formal in tone, regardless of context). For example:
Asking your coworkers about an upcoming meeting?
Telling a longtime customer you’re cancelling their insurance policy?
Sending your CEO a situation report?
Informing your shareholders of a company buyout?
Requesting yesterday’s meeting minutes?
Notifying your customers of a class action lawsuit?
Formatting Issues / Concerns
This is probably the most common problem I found throughout your responses. In a lot of cases, I
just wasn’t sure what type of document each of your documents was supposed to be. Some, while
written like a memo, didn’t have the memo header, while others looked like they could either be
formal letters or e-mails. In revision, make sure each of your documents follows the correct
formatting for that particular type of document. In addition, as I have said earlier in this memo,
make sure that you address each of your documents appropriately given their recipient.
If you need help regarding the formatting of e-mails, memos, and formal letters, I recommend
rereading Chapters 12, 13, and 14 in the course textbook on MyReviewers. These readings are short,
very accessible, and incredibly informative.
Reprimanding a Subordinate
It’s time to talk about tone again: when formally reprimanding a subordinate, as is the case for a
number of your scenarios, you have to maintain a professional – i.e., not accusatory nor aggressive –
tone throughout the reprimand.
There’s a number of reasons for this: 1) your recipient is potentially facing the loss of their job, and,
regardless of the circumstances surrounding that loss, your recipient still deserves respect; and 2)
there are potential legal ramifications for the wording of that reprimand.
Character attacks, overly aggressive or patronizing language – if the recipient were disgruntled
enough, there could be enough in their reprimand to sue on the basis of workplace harassment, and
the fact that the reprimand is in writing is certainly not going to help your case.
Of course, I realize this example is a bit extreme. None of the responses I read were enough to be
considered outright malicious. However, my point still stands: when formally reprimanding a
subordinate, be polite and be professional. The fact that they’re getting a written reprimand at all is,
in most cases, message enough.
Unintentionally Callous / Not Apologetic Enough
A number of documents related to the apologetic scenarios felt unintentionally callous, or at least,
not understanding enough of the problems their audiences were facing. Remember the negative
news scenarios we wrote about in class a few weeks ago? Remember how we discussed the
difference in magnitude between “an inconvenience” and the loss of a person’s job? The same
principle is at play here – choosing the right word for the right connotation.
If you responded to one of these scenarios, the scenarios that asked you to address a customer’s
problem brought about by your company’s actions, I would make sure that your response is as
apologetic and understanding as you think it is.
Clearly Defined Sections and Section Headings
This section relates to memo formatting: when using section headers in a memo, make sure your
headings are clearly defined from the rest of your text. Otherwise, they don’t really do what headers
are supposed to in the first place. Generally, headers are made to stand out by bolding them, and
spacing them away from other text.
More Detail Required
While brevity is certainly a goal in professional and technical writing, there does come a point when
too much brevity undermines the communicative ability of the document itself. In other words,
sure, relaying your message efficiently is important, but you know what’s more important? Leaving
your reader enough detail to accurately understand what message you’re trying to convey. During
revision, make sure you’re documents are painting a clear enough picture for your reader.
Avoid Exclamation Points
As a general rule, I would avoid exclamation points. They’re too strong. Reading a sentence
punctuated by an exclamation point is like reading a sentence written in all caps: it’s difficult to take
the writer, or what they have to say, seriously.
Single Space Professional Documents
Professional and technical writing documents should be single-spaced, with a single space between
each paragraph. This sounds nitpicky at first, but this, coupled with paragraphs that aren’t indented,
make for a difficult read. Make sure your paragraphs are easily discernable from one another.
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